First came Corinthians 13, then The Beatles and countless singers in the 1980s, and now it’s hundreds of children and young people around the Diocese of Leicester declaring their thoughts on the power of love.
In the recent findings of our latest ‘listening exercise’ on the theme of leadership, loving was by far the quality young people valued most in those they look to for guidance and support.
During September and October, 244 children from nine primary schools, one secondary school and nine church groups around the diocese, took part in facilitated listening groups where they were asked to share their thoughts and ideas about what they valued in a leader - including who inspires them 
and who they would speak to about their faith.
Whilst ‘loving’ came top of the list, other desirable qualities and behaviours appreciated by our young people included kindness, caring, courage, listening well, communicative, fair, fun, serving others and honesty.
With the most frequent responses being character traits, there was also an emphasis on the need for our leaders to build strong and trusting relationships with young people, while having the skills to be able to help people.
Our young people look to leaders who are relatable and role models; they need someone who is available and open, someone who has time for them and makes them feel seen and heard.
When asked who they wanted to be like in their daily life, the most frequent answers were mum and dad, and teachers, with people they ‘watch’ having a significant impact on them, such as celebrities, influencers, and sportspeople.
If they had a question about faith, most primary aged children would likely speak to their parents, teachers, or a vicar, while secondary aged young people would turn to a youth worker, and rarely ever a teacher or sibling.
The theme of the listening exercise was set by the Church of England’s 30k Project Board, chaired by the Bishop of Leicester, Martyn Snow, which aims to bring about change and train 30,000 new children and youth workers across the country by 2030.
How we authentically hear and respond to the voice of children and young people in the diocese is incredibly important to us, so to find some answers, this year we’ve been experimenting with a termly process of youth-led agenda setting, listening, sense making and reporting.
In Spring Term 2023, 43 young voices in three schools and four church groups, explored the theme of listening. They asked Bishop Martyn three questions, including: How do you think the diocese could help children and young people feel more listened to in church?
In Summer Term 2023, 91 young voices in seven schools and five church groups, considered how they practice faith. We found out prayer is an important faith practice in school, church and at home.
A group of young people recently presented the findings of this leadership themed exercise to Bishop Martyn and members of the Church of England Project Board, at Brockington College.
Bishop Martyn said: “It is incredibly important for the Church of England, at every level, to be continually listening to the voices of children and young people if we want our communities to be spaces where they feel they belong.
“In previous listening exercises, we have heard half of children and young people did not feel listened to at church, but that churches can help them to grow in their faith more by being safe spaces to ask questions and being more interactive.
“I am struck by how the qualities which the children and young people described as valuing in leaders revolve around character rather than skills, and the importance of being relational.”
Matt Young, Youth Engagement and Intergenerational Communities Enabler for the Diocese of Leicester, said: “We have so far completed three listening exercises with children and young people throughout the diocese. Each time I have been amazed by the depth of thought and relevance of the responses we have received. Genuinely listening to and learning from children and young people has significantly shaped my thinking and practice this past year. As we continue to facilitate these listening exercises, we hope to hear from more and more young voices.
“In this latest listening exercise, what stood out to me was how children and young people value genuine relationships, rather than those with an agenda. It is a reminder that they want to be known, seen, and heard for who they are now not who they might grow up to be.
“I think it would make a huge difference if across the Church of England, we were able to reflect on whether that approach is at the heart of our work with children and young people.”
Reflecting on the responses from listening groups, the Bishops’ Children & Youth Council set four questions for Bishop Martyn to respond to by video.
1. How could the church include ‘character traits’ in the training and development of leaders who work with children and young people?
2. How could the Church be more accessible and relatable to children and young people?
3. How could the Church support parents and teachers more?
4. How could the Church make more time and space for children and young people to build trusting relationships with adults?
You can read the full report, along with those from previous listening exercises, and Bishop Martyn’s video responses, here.